11.06.2011

some (heavy) random thoughts

This post will be a little deep but some stuff I feel like I need to share....or get out of my system.....just to keep it real.

The Mr. left for our new home in Virginia 8 weeks ago.  Now I know that there are some that say that is nothing compared to what they've endured, but it is by far the longest amount of time we have been separated.  I admit I am slowing down.  Getting plain worn out.  Taking care of 4 kids & all the extras they require (homework, church stuff, playmates, etc.) takes a lot out of a parent.  Especially if they have to do all the parenting on their own.  We are in the process of selling our home.  I bust my butt every day just in case someone wants to come look at it.  But in the 8 weeks we've had it on the market, we've not had a single looker.  I have no idea why.  It's rather discouraging and I am beginning to wonder how we are going to pay for our things to get to VA.  We can't live apart forever.  It just isn't right.  So for now we are relying on the Lord for help & comfort & strength to get through.  I know He has a plan for us.  I just wish I knew what it was.

The last few months have been rough.  I have a hard time thinking clearly.  I'm tired (a lot) and grouchy.  The list goes on & on.  I also have hypothyroidism, thus the cruddy health issues.  I wanted to get over it...treat it.....control it.  But after seeing a handful of endocrinologists & a naturopath over the last 4 years or so, I've given up on help.  In fact, about 3 years ago, I gave up on all doctors completely.  Which meant I stopped taking a steroid medication I had been taking all my life (because I was born with a condition called adrenal hyperplasia).  I lost weight.  After a full year of being medicine free, I lost 75lbs.  It was great for my self-esteem, but my thyroid symptoms were back on in full force and I knew I needed help.  So I found an endocrinologist that actually listened to me when I told him how I felt and that I wanted him to work with a naturopath to "fix" me.  In a short time, I came to realize my naturopath was more of a pill pusher & I wasn't feeling any better over time.  My visits stopped.  My endocrine doc regulated my steroid usage & put me on something new to help with my thyroid symptoms.  In the last six months, I gained 35lbs. back.  And my symptoms are the worst they've ever been.  In the last few weeks I had the thought that I should change my diet.  I've read/heard several times that people change what they eat to help with cancer & other illnesses.  Why couldn't this help me?  For the most part, I eat pretty well.  I hardly ever buy processed foods and try to watch the sugar intake.  But I am a sucker for chocolate.  Milk chocolate.  I could eat it all day long.  So while pinning on Pinterest late one night, I stumbled on a pin that I felt was my answer to this whole diet thing.  A witty woman by the name of Sarah Wilson recently put out an e-book titled "I Quit Sugar".  I was a responsible pinned & pinned through to her site.  And I couldn't stop reading it.  I could relate to her posts about thyroid issues on so many levels.  Quitting sugar is supposed to help my body better handle the crappy thyroid symptoms - something traditional medicine hasn't done for me.  So I'm giving it a go.  I'm in the middle of week one of the process and have already noticed that I eat a lot of food with hidden sugars.  Kind of eye-opening.  I'll be sharing my thoughts/results with you during this quitting sugar process.  Not because I want accolades every time I lose a pound (if I lose any at all), but because I am hoping I can help someone else in the process.  I know how crappy it is to go through this alone.  No one else should have to.

Don't worry.  Not all my posts will be this serious.  It will be the same around here, for the most part.  But I am a mom & have a real life & you need to know that it's not all la-dee-da around here all the time.  Ya know?

Oh, here's a link to Sarah's website.  You'll love it.  I promise ;)


xo,
--Anna

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